Monday, October 23, 2006
When Is It Too Soon?????
Ladies and Gents, is it ever "too soon" for us to sleep with someone? If so, when is it too soon? Why do we tend to equate a "good, meaningful relationship" with holding out the goods? Haven't all of us been with someone that we sleep with soon and the relationship lasts longer than expected? I know this has been the case for me a few times. I found myself "getting it on" because I was horny and I needed a piece. At these times I was not worried about what would happen the next day, how he may look at me, what others may say, etc. In other words, I was just getting a piece of ass because I needed it. This is called sex with no emotions. But, as women, can we all do that? If not, why not? Are we still living in a world where the outcome of our relationships are dependent on how soon we choose to sleep with someone? If we sleep with someone too soon and the relationship doesn't work do we still blame it on the fact that we slept with a person early? I don't think the two have anything to do with one another. If you are in a relationship that doesn't work it could be because you actually get to know the person as time goes on and realize that he/she is not for you or they realize you are not for them. I don't think it has anything to do with giving it up too soon. But, maybe I'm wrong... And for those of us who think that it can be too soon to have sex, do we think that if we break up with someone shortly after sleeping with them something about us is going to be lost? Why is it a big deal if we have sex and then stop seeing someone? What difference is it going to make? It amazes me to hear very independent women talk about this; talk about "holding out" in case the newfound interest is "the one." Is it because we have to have some sort of feeling for the person we are sleeping with? Does it have to be that deep? Can't we just like the person for whatever reason and want to have a good time? Or am I wrong? Now, I will admit there was a time when I did believe in holding out, but I guess my hormones just took over, and holding out is not all it's cracked up to be....But, maybe I'm wrong. Are we really still saving ourselves, and if so, saving ourselves from what????
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
for MEt here is a too soon and that's b/c all but my last 2 relationships were sex first and then obligation. so sex in and of itself wasnt what ruined the relationship, but for whatever reason, i felt obligated to continue something b/c i was giving up the goodies. i did have one "relationship" (or maybe i should say arrangement) that was all about sex, but it was inevitable for me that feelings started to surface, but maybe b/c it was with another girl (a str8 one at that..). i never broke up with someone soon after giving up the goodies b/c i felt some sort of emotional obligation.. stupid in hindsight but that's what i was thinking and for ME i think it would have been easier to break (or never start) the relationship had sex not been involved.
BUT i dont think virginity or not having sex is some great moral advantage. it either works for you or it doesnt. you gotta figure out for yourself (the general "you" that is)
hmmm ... intersting question. When is too soon to have sex, well that depends...
If you are on a date for the 1st time but have been speaking with this person for some time, then a connection has been made and sex may come easy or be inevitable. The physical attraction exists it just needed confirmation that there was more to it than just his/her sexy body or movements.
The concept of too soon is "man-made", tend to put time limits and restraints or restrictions on actions based on the morals or beliefs of others or the societies we reside or exist within.
Humans are no different than animals. Look at two dogs .. they meet, sniff butts and screw if that is the season they are in.
Men meet women or other men, sniff each other and want to screw but decide .."hmmm, lemme see what s/he has in between their ears and whether or not it matches what is b/w their legs."
The same trials, tribulations and circumstances you would experience w/o the involvement of sex are the same as those you will experience with the involvement of sex.
So is it a question of it being too soon ..no it is a question of whether or not we ad peoiple are of the mental capacity to handle situations... the sex is simply the physical embodiment of the passion, emotion, urgency, pleasure that we as humans feel.
When is it too soon? It is too soon when we are unable to acknowledge the feelings that we are experiencing and are unable to manage them.
Post a Comment