Questions from a teacher...

There are times when I think I am really an effective teacher. I try to teach my students things they need to know in order to pass standardized tests, get into college, and thrive while they are there, but I also want to teach them things that they need to know, should know, in order to be productive citizens. I want them to be able to "see" the world that they live in for what it is. In order to do that I have to take less conventional approaches to teaching, and teach them less conventional things. I do all of this because I genuinely care about my students, and about their futures, and that is because I am with them every...single...day. It is inevitable, right? So, because I care I put a tremendous amount of effort into each of my lessons. And there is nothing more frustrating when they (my students) are not completely receptive. It bothers me to no end. It worries me, upsets me, and even makes me sick at times.

I try to remember myself as a student, and no, i wasn't always engaged, but I did the work, because I had no other choice, and because I wanted to get out and go to college. I did what I had to do. It is so frustrating when students sit in my class and don't listen, but then come to me after the lesson and ask questions...not because they were not able to grasp the lesson, but because they were not listening. It is so frustrating to tell a student to be quiet and as I'm telling them, they are looking right at me, but still talking to the person next to them, not even trying to abort the conversation. It is so frustrating to give my studnets templates and examples of the work they are to produce and get nothing from them, but blank stares and excuses. But what is so ironic about this is that they say they enjoy my class. I motivate them, get them engaged, have them talking about the lessons even after they leave my classroom, but to get them to put something on paper is like pulling teeth. It makes me question my ability as a teacher despite the accolades I get from other teachers, administrators, and even former students. Am I doing the right thing? Should I move on and allow another teacher the opportunity to come in and do what I can't? Would I be more effective somewhere else? Teaching is hard enough by itself. All of this "extra" is almost too much to bear...

What is a teacher to do?