Wednesday, March 16, 2005

I'm a Ho...Not a Slut

Okay, what is wrong with me??? I was watching America's Next Model, and a girl collapsed during judging. And I thought that was the funniest thing EVER. I mean I was laughing hysterically; I didn't even wait to see if the girl was okay. And when they did the replay, I laughed even harder. So I told a friend, and she was like "Why would you laugh at that???? That was sooo sad." That's got to be the effect of being around insensitive high school kids, as another high school teacher (I'm not saying any names, you know who you are) laughed hysterically with me. What's wrong with me/us?

So now to business...I'm a little sad that none of you responded to my last blog. Aren't you all happy that I finally got some??? But I won't harp on that anymore =)

Is there a difference between a slut and a ho? Merriam Webster's regards these terms as synonym's...actually slut, and whore. Both according to dictionary definitions are promiscuous women who have sex for money; in other words they are both prostitutes. However, when I use the term "ho" I don't really use it as an abbreviated term for whore. (As far as the money thing is concerned, I have to agree with the character Moll Flanders who said that being a prostitute is no different from being a married woman [or in today's time some married women]. Both are having sex for money; one is just an accepted occupation.) But in saying that, I do think there is a big difference between a slut and a ho. For me, a ho is someone who loves to have sex, and has a lot of it, BUT has a sense of power with her shit. A ho is a respectable person, but isn't passive or ashamed of her sexual experience. Sex doesn't define a ho, but rather, she defines herself partially through her sexual escapades...if that makes any sense. Like a ho, a slut has a lot of sex, but sex/the number of partners define the slut. She does not really have any power in her sexual life, and she is kinda, well, she is nasty. Am I a ho...probably...Am I a slut...HELL NO. But that's how I feel as a female. I was discussing my next blog with a male friend, and this is what he had to say about sluts:

slut: n. A woman of bad character; a prostitute. sluttish. adj,

Sure, some of the sluts I've known before had issues and it's possible they needed therapy but they were exciting and if anything had interesting, unqiue characters. So, I disagree here. I've always been interested and somewhat attracted (hey I'm a guy, don't hate me) to these type of women. Women willing to take the initiative and break from mold that suffocates their female friends. With the media searing our minds with a steady stream of sterotypical images of women, it's refreshing to come into contact with one secure enough to know who she wants and when. A women "so seductive," 50 Cent states,"you should see the way she wind."

I agree with my friend partially. I think it is good that women "break from the mold that suffocates their female friends...[and] it's refreshing to come into contact with one secure enough to know who she wants and when." But, I would call this person a ho...not a slut. I briefly discussed this with a few people, and men seem to think differently from women. Men, unlike women seem to think these terms are interchangeable, whereas women think there is some sort of distinction between the two. So does that mean that those of us (women) that feel empowered and confident about being "loose" are still viewed as "sluts" in the eyes of men? Do we think that calling ourselves hoes is really a good thing, when really it means the same thing that we are trying to avoid? And if the two mean the same thing, is it just more acceptable to call ourselves hoes? And if so, why??? Could "ho" just be another word that we have altered so that we can feel better about ourselves and not degraded? Men and women I need to hear from you =)

Wow, that was a random mouthful!

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

okay i've never broken it down like that in my head before, all scientific and whatnot (dont you just love and hate that word at the same time.. whatnot... but i digress). but i know i definitely do distinguish the two. you hit the nail on the head when you say slut is just nasty. i think of Mister's father in The Color Purple ("and i hear she got that nasty 'oman disease") when i hear the word slut. and i also think of some insecure girl who just gives it away b/c she thinks she has to.

now when i think of ho. i still think of a woman (hey, i notice i see sluts as girls and hos as women. hmmmm) who gets her freak on like a pro but she could care less what others think. fuck 'em (figuratively and literally).

so all that to say, yeah, you're not crazy. there is a difference.

Anonymous said...

i think when attaching these labels to indiviudals in sexual relationships, we tend to be very myopic in their assingment, using one catchall to categorise our/others behaviour. the act itself has many different meanings and we are different selves depending on the context. so whether you are ho, slut, whore, or a wife really depends on the situation and who is doing the defining. we all can agree that labels are subjective, these words mean different things to all of us. it's useless to even attempt some sort of consensus in their meanings, and anyhow what's the point?! i think we spend to much time labeling our actions than actually engaging in it. if you feel the need, sleep with whomever, trust me, i dont care! just dont spread your cooties and please bear in mind the world is already heavily overpopulated!
:)

realityintimated said...

I'm inclined to agree that there really isn't any huge difference; it all depends on context. When I saw your blog, I laughed because I thought of Whoopi's comment in How Stella Got Her Groove Back. She was happy to be in Jamaica so she could become a "big ole hoe slut." No distinction needed.

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