Thursday, March 10, 2005

Back in the land of the living, breathing, and...ya know

I've heard from a few of you who comment on my page. Some of you have commented continally checking on my blog that hasn't had a new posting in nearly a week. Well, I have to apologize, but a bitch needed to handle some very important business. Sorry for the delay.

FINALLY...the 18, practically 19 month drought has come to an end, and I'm back in the land of the...fucking! And I have to say, I have absolutely no complaints...I couldn't be happier with the experience. Yeah, I was a little hesitant at first, but soon learned that some things are just like riding a bicycle. And those "fears" that I mentioned in an earlier blog ended abruptly.

So, all went GREAT, but now there is a BUT. And because of this but, I can't be as excited as I want to be about no longer being a celibate yet desiring woman. I have to say, the but in no way, shape, or form relates to the one who took me out of my depressing state, but more so with me. Because I won't be getting this on a regular, and when I say regular I mean a couple to several times a week, I'm kinda in an awkward place. I waited all this time, and now I'm going to be waiting to get my next little piece (no pun intended...really). Would it have been better to wait for someone I could be regular with so that I wouldn't have to feel this new frustration? What good is sex if you can't get it whenever you want it? Once you start, you can't stop, right? And while waiting for a month or so is no where near waiting 19 months, it's still waiting, and damnit, I don't want to have to wait. I will, but I don't want to. The end of the 19 month hiatus made me instantly remember something...I love to have sex. And yes, I know I'm really putting myself out there, but isn't that what this is for? Am I just being a ho?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

i'm not sure how to respond to this one, but i will! your ability to pick up after 19 months and to not only have sex but to FUCK is admirable. when i had my 18 month involuntary celibacy, it was brutal the first few months and after that i was numb. i didnt even care anymore. i swear it scarred my libido for life. but now i find that when i cant have it i want it more. and if i can have it anytime, i dont really want it. so maybe this month to month sex wont be so bad for you after all...

hmmmm...

let us know how it goes

realityintimated said...

Congrats on getting some! (I know I'm a little late, but you just proved that it's better late than never, right)? I definitely wouldn't consider your actions hoeish in any way...you should enjoy yourself and as long as you don't have any problem with what you're doing...who are we to judge? Have fun!